Confessions of someone with a snoring partner

By 2:00 AM

I love my husband. But some nights that love turns to seething, irrational hatred.

Not because I am a psychopath. But because his insanely loud snoring keeps me awake…

Here are a few things anyone with a partner who snores will understand:

  1. When you say good night you always add ‘please don’t snore’ – like it’ll make any difference.
  2. They then reply ‘ok, good night’ – like it’ll make any difference.
  3. It always takes you ages to get to sleep because you know The Snore will begin as soon as you start to drift off.
  4. You sometimes stare at their sleeping, snoring face and feel as though you HATE them.

woman-laying-next-to-her-snoring-husband

  1. You know you are in for a really bad night when they start snoring BEFORE they are asleep.
  2. In a fit of sleep-deprived rage you have held their nose to make it stop.
  3. But all this does is make them snore even louder but through their mouth, which is even worse.
  4. At one point during the night you will tell them, ‘I can’t go on like this. You’ll have to go to the doctor. Your snoring is RUINING OUR RELATIONSHIP!’
  5. They reply that they will do something about it. Have an operation, lose weight, try hypnotherapy.

woman-hugging-her-pillow

  1. They do nothing.
  2. While the continuous snore is bad, the sudden burst of noise after a five-minute silence is quite terrifying.
  3. The first time the snoring wakes you up, you go with a gentle poke and a polite request for them to ‘please stop snoring’.
  4. The second time the snoring wakes you up, you go for full-on swearing.
  1. It’s particularly annoying when you wake them up and they tell you; ‘I wasn’t snoring!’ Like you have been lying awake all night just for the fun of it.
  2. By 2am you’re considering a divorce.
  3. Some nights it’s so bad that you/they move on to the sofa but you can still hear them. Or can you? Is the sound just stuck in your head? Make it STOP!!

51% of the divorces in America today state snoring/sleep apnea as one of the reasons for a divorce. 27% of the couples in America now sleep in separate rooms. Sad but true…..